When you are struggling to stay away from someone you once felt so connected to, it is one of the hardest things to do. The memories keep you longing for what could have been, but you can’t escape the reality of what has happened between you two. Although your heart may break, and you can’t sleep at night because of the ruminating thoughts it does get better. The constant replaying of the relationship makes it hard for you to focus. It just doesn’t make sense, and trying to figure out what happened in the relationship never comes together just right. It’s one of those times when you can’t let your heart lead, because it might hurt you. This post will help you stop yourself from going back to a toxic relationship.
Explore the qualities of the relationship
When the connection has been is fresh you will find yourself struggling between the heart (emotional) and logical points of your mind. The urge to text, call and check social media is high. We know how toxic relationships affect you. Explore the qualities of the relationship. Sit with those uncomfortable feelings about the way the person added to your life. Next, consider how the same person subtracted from the quality of your life.
It’s painful to do a deep dive into examing the highs and lows of the relationship. Doing this exploration allows you the opportunity to work through the facts of the relationship’s quality. Just because you had a history together does not mean you have a future together.
I teach people how to fully break free from the trauma bond. This unhealthy narcissistic cycle of abuse keeps you trapped in a toxic relationship. Recognizing the signs of the cycle of abuse and then responding in a supportive way will help you heal a lot quicker.
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FIND JOYOwn your truth
Your truth is valid, own it. When you are in a relationship with a toxic person it’s easy to lose yourself. The toxic person may have done and said things to tear your confidence down. It makes it hard to understand what was real. The abuse from toxic relationships is so damaging people begin to question themselves, their reality (gaslighting), and everything else in their life.
Being stuck in a toxic relationship makes it hard for you to make decisions. It’s even harder to trust yourself. Making this brave decision to not go back to a toxic relationship is not an easy one. The decision to not stay connected to the toxic person will save your life. Stopping yourself from going back to a toxic relationship is a huge step in opening up a new chapter of your life.
I help people examine the facts of a situation. Take time to identify your emotions. Do not label the emotions as good or bad. Consider using supportive and unsupportive categories to help organize your emotions. Explore what makes your truth factual for you.
Trust your gut
Your body will tell you long before you have already decided to not return to the abusive relationship. Listen to that upset stomach, uneasy feeling, and racing thoughts signaling to you these are all warning signs letting you know there is a potential danger. Do not ignore those caution sirens going off inside your body.
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Imagine a future where the weight of overwhelm, exhaustion, and feeling powerless is lifted from your shoulders. Picture yourself living in a newfound clarity, cutting through the fog of confusion that once clouded your heart. Engaging in these activities you will find the strength to break free from the bonds of narcissistic trauma and step into a life filled with peace and joy.
GET THE DOWNLOADSWrite it out
Make a list of all of the reasons the relationship was toxic. Write out what the person did, said, how they made you feel, etc. This is great for the moments when you start to think about the past before things got really bad. The list is also a helpful reminder of why it is not healthy to not engage in any form with the person. No contact is one of the best ways to heal.
Make your healing from the toxic relationship rock-solid
Going to counseling is one of the best ways to heal. Counseling allows you the opportunity to work through your thoughts, emotions, and events of the relationship without judgment. If you have lost friends and family because of the relationship you may feel very isolated. Your counselor will not only hear you but provide helpful ways to heal from the toxic relationship.
To get one-to-one support for healing from your toxic relationship start now!
Additional forms of support but NOT substitutes for counseling are:
- Support groups
- Following social media pages are helpful resources
- Reading blog posts like this
- Talking with trusted friends and family
- Journaling.
Receive clarity, confidence, and closure with our help
Let’s embark on a transformative journey together. Our process is designed to help you heal. We will guide you to safety, help you rebuild, and teach you how to invite joy into your life. We will rediscover your inner self and unlock your true power.
We provide online counseling in Texas only.